Let’s Be Real: Adulting Is Overrated, Let’s Just Do Life
Remember being a kid and thinking adulthood meant staying up as late as you wanted and eating cookies for breakfast? Fast-forward a few years, and ta-da — the reality hits. Adulthood looks more like paying bills, calling customer service on loop, endlessly doing laundry, and grocery shopping (again? already?).
And we’re supposed to do this forever?
No wonder “adulting” gets such a bad rap. It feels like an endless to-do list with no gold star at the end. And for a lot of us, that idea of what it means to be a responsible adult starts to suck the joy out of life. But what if we could rewrite the script?
Why “Adulting” Feels So Heavy
Let’s call it out for what it is: “Adulting” has become shorthand for the grind. It’s that mental checklist we keep running — did I pay the internet bill? Are we out of toilet paper? Is there anything edible in the fridge?
The word itself is loaded. It carries this pressure to be constantly on. Always organized, always productive, never forgetting anything. As if being a grown-up means being a flawless machine. Yikes. Who made those rules?
It doesn’t help that we pass this idea down like a cursed family recipe. “Just wait until you’re an adult,” they say, “life gets hard!” And guess what? We grew up believing that being miserable is just the tax you pay to have your own Wi-Fi.
But here’s the thing — that mentality is not only toxic, it’s totally optional.
No, I’m Not Saying We Stop Paying Bills
Let’s be clear — when I say “say no to adulting,” I’m not suggesting we throw our responsibilities in the trash and live in chaos. I’m talking about ditching the mindset that being an adult means you’re always in serious, high-efficiency, no-fun mode.
Because here’s the truth: no one “adults” 24/7. Even the adult-iest adult take naps. Even parents eat snacks in the closet to escape their kids for five minutes. So why do we expect ourselves to be productive and perfect all the time?
That kind of constant pressure is a one-way ticket to burnout.
My Wake-Up Call: Single Mom Mode
When I became a single mom a decade ago, I dove head-first into extreme adulting. I thought that’s what I had to do. Manage every detail. Keep everything running. Be the rock. Handle finances, clean every surface, feed everyone healthy-ish meals — and do it all with a smile (or at least no visible crying).
Four loads of laundry a week? Check. Cooking every meal? Check. Paying bills while sleep-deprived and buried in baby wipes? Double check. I was “adulting” at full throttle. And if that’s the gold standard of being a grown-up, then yeah — adulthood is miserable.
But somewhere along the way, I realized I was so focused on doing all the things that I wasn’t actually living. I wasn’t laughing. I wasn’t having fun. And honestly? I wasn’t even taking care of myself.
What If We Flipped the Script?
What if we stopped aiming to “adult” and instead asked ourselves a different question:
How do we build a life that feels sustainable, joyful, and fulfilling?
Let’s stop “adulting” just to tick boxes and start “doing life” in a way that makes sense for us. Because yes, there are certain things we need to do — laundry, meal prep, paying bills — but those things don’t have to consume our entire identity.
Being responsible doesn’t mean abandoning fun. It means creating a foundation that supports the life you want. Like keeping the lights on not just because we have to, but because we love late-night movie marathons. Or cooking meals because it keeps us healthy enough to do the things that light us up — whether that’s hiking, dancing, or crushing it at karaoke.
Step One: Rethink the To-Do List
After years of “adulting burnout,” I decided it was time for a change. Here’s how I started taking back my life:
1. Get Real with Money (Without Panic)
I looked at my finances not with fear, but with curiosity. What were my goals? What could I tweak? I automated what I could and reviewed my goals every six months. That gave me breathing room and helped me prioritize things like a small emergency fund and guilt-free money for fun.
BTW, if you’re starting from scratch, the Mel Robbins podcast with Tiffany Aliche (a.k.a. The Budgetnista) is a goldmine: Watch it here.
2. Stop Doing Everything Alone
I made a list of adulting tasks I didn’t hate (like budgeting) and ones I really struggled with (deep cleaning, I’m looking at you). So I got creative — I swapped skills with a friend. I helped her with money stuff, she helped me clean. We both won. Spent great time together. And when I could afford it, I hired someone to do deep cleans twice a year. Game-changer.
3. Normalize Asking for Help
Whether it’s a partner, a friend, or a professional — getting support doesn’t make you a failure. It makes you a human. Delegating some tasks let me breathe, and more importantly, it gave me time to focus on what mattered to me.
Step Two: Bring Back the Fun
This might sound wild, but I gave myself permission to enjoy life. I revisited the things that used to make me happy. For me, it was drawing and sketching. I carved out time to be creative again — no deadlines, no pressure — just me and a sketchpad.
I also made time to laugh with my kids, play outside, go on little adventures. I gave myself the grace to be silly, spontaneous, and not perfectly put together. And you know what? The world didn’t end. It actually got brighter.
Let’s normalize hobbies, fun, and rest as adults. Because seriously — no one dreams of growing up just to become a laundry robot.
What If We All Just…Did Life?
Imagine a world where instead of obsessing over how “adult” we are, we asked: Am I living the life I want? That’s the vibe we need.
We don’t have to live in survival mode forever. We can be responsible and joyful. We can pay bills and have hobbies. We can raise kids and still feel like ourselves.
So no, I’m not “adulting” anymore.
I’m doing life — intentionally, imperfectly, and with a lot more laughter.
Let’s Retire the Word “Adulting”
Let’s stop using “adulting” like it’s a punishment and start talking about building lives we actually want to wake up to. Let’s raise kids who believe adulthood isn’t a prison sentence, but a blank canvas.
Be responsible. Yes. But also be kind to yourself. Make space for joy. Do life in a way that feels good, not just looks good on paper.
So here’s your permission slip:
Forget “adulting.”
Do life. Live fully. And don’t forget to have fun along the way.
Remember, its a Life of Ands 🙂
